Numbing Out

Computer

TV

Phone

Did I check Facebook recently?

It’s been 30 min

Is anything else posted?

I could use a drink or 2 or 3

Why don’t I have any percocets left

Maybe I should take up cigarettes

No – I don’t like going outside constantly.

Reading – I could read

I really should be cleaning or cooking or running errands or writing or looking for a job….

But – let me just send this text

Check this e-mail

Browse through Twitter

Have I been on LinkedIn recently? Who uses that anyway?

Watch this show and the one after and the one after

Crap – the day is done. Too late for cleaning, for job hunting, for errands

I can write tomorrow

I can pay the bill tomorrow

It all can wait until tomorrow

But can it?

How many tomorrows can it wait?

While I numb out on social media and food and TV….

 

What are we running away from?

We all do it in some form or another.

Shopping, drinking, smoking, drugs, food, TV, social media…..

What are we trying not to feel?

What are we afraid of trying that we are putting off?

Why is the unknown scarier than enduring the misery in your life now?

We all have different reasons and different ways of numbing out.

Some people keep busy to numb out….Too busy, sorry too busy to really live my life!!

They are all addictions used to keep us from moving forward, from entering into the unknown.

To keep change from happening – like we can really stop change.

And so we get sick and things go wrong

And WHY DOES THIS ALL HAPPEN TO ME!!!!

Because you are resisting

Because you are numbing

Because change is inevitable….

 

So become aware of where and how you numb

And just watch it

Look at it

Listen to it

Like an observer

And then release it – sometimes all at once but usually slowly

Little by little

Do the thing you fear

Or a step towards it

One little baby step

And another…and another

And suddenly, your WHOLE life is changed!

And it’s awesome!

But then you start to numb again

Because a new change is coming

And once again you are afraid, but it’s okay

You know how to do this now

And this time, it will come faster and with less resistance.

 

This is life

Live it… Don’t just exist in it.

 

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